Wait, Is It Actually Possible to Do Things Alone Here?

There are moments when I look forward and think about how little time I have left in this country, and I panic a little. How could I possibly be leaving in a few short weeks? There are so many things left to do in this country, and I doubt there will be time for me to do them all. 

But then there are moments when I look back at all the things I have done. The other day, I was sitting in my room at the Nest, and I looked over at my bulletin board. About a week after I arrived in Cape Town, I started putting brochures, postcards, stickers, etc. on it, and at this point it’s so fully covered I can barely see the original orange color of the board. And looking at all the things I’ve picked up and put on that board in my time here, I had this strange feeling of how much I have accomplished in just a few short weeks. I remembered how overwhelming it was for the first few days, looking at an unfamiliar room, and an intimidating, empty orange bulletin board. And all of a sudden I realized how much I have changed since I’ve been here.

I think what’s surprised me the most about studying abroad has been the ways in which I have stepped outside my comfort zone. I don’t know exactly what I was expecting, but so far I have definitely surprised myself. I’ve taken several flights completely on my own (I am not a huge fan of flying so this has been an accomplishment), I have taken public transportation on my own, and I have gained a fairly deep understanding of this country. I’ve asked the uncomfortable questions, and I have definitely had moments where I have made a fool out of myself. Coming into this country, I think I wanted to immediately be an expert on everything. And perhaps that was naïve, considering how little research I actually did before coming here. But I have learned as I’ve gone, and I’ve started to form my own personal understanding of this place.

As strange as it might seem, I’ve gotten used to the constant protests on campus, and within classroom discussions, I am no longer so surprised to hear a student blatantly tell a professor that what they are teaching is wrong, or irrelevant. South Africa, I’ve learned, is so similar to the United States in a lot of ways, but at the same time it is so different. I think the constant unrest comes as a symbol of how different a period of history it is in than the United States. It’s fascinating, and I finally feel like I am beginning to find a place here. I’ll certainly be sad to leave, but I don’t think my involvement with South Africa will end when I step off the plane, back in the United States.